One would think that if pain was the result of one's actions, one would discontinue the action.

Tip 1: If you wish to avoid oil change hangover go to Jiffy Lube

Tip 2: If youre a dumb ass like me, drink lots of water before passing out.

Tip 3: When you wake up move very slowly to the medicine cabinet and take 3 Advils. Go back to bed.

Tip 4: Explain to wife that you saved allot of money by changing your oil at Ricks and she should be proud that youre such a frugal guy.

How to pick up chicks

A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. After a couple of sips he looks up and sees a woman sitting at the end of the bar. He calls the bartender over and says he'd like to buy the lady a drink. The bartender says "Listen pal, let me save you some trouble. She's a lesbian".

The guy takes a second, thinks it over, shrugs his shoulders and says "that's ok. I'd like to buy her a drink anyway." So the bartender brings the woman her drink. The woman lifts her glass and gives the man a nod of thanks.

The guy gets up from his bar stool and saunters over to the woman. As he's sitting down on the stool next to her he says "So, what part of lesbia are you from?"